Practical Advice for Parents

• Remember! Their anxiety is very real
  Many parents think their child just wants attention or is making things up. It is important to remember that anxiety is very real for the child, even if it seems silly to us. The fact that the child expresses his fear be it through actions or words, shows us that he places his trust in us. We must respect that trust and address it in all seriousness.
• Find the balance between understanding and limits
  In many case it is important not to give in to the child's anxiety and change things around the house. Laying down firm boundaries gives the child a sense of security. It is important to stick to those boundaries or limits. For example, insisting that your child go to school even if he objects to going, may be very difficult, yet necessary. However it is not necessary to force the child to do non essential things since this may exacerbate his anxiety even more. Finding the delicate balance that lies between understanding and limits is one the greatest challenges parents face.
• Be sensitive to your child's fears
  Children pick up very easily when we are troubled, sad or suffering anxiety of our own. In order to convey a sense of security we have to be calm ourselves. Use relaxation techniques and share your concerns with other adults. This will help you to be more available to your children. If necessary seek professional help. There is a direct relationship between parents' anxiety and children. The more effectively you cope with your anxiety, the better your child will do.
• Listen to your child
  Children tend to be less verbal than adults, so it is necessary to be more attuned to the messages they are conveying through play, games, and drawings. Adults can offer hugs, go on outings, read books together and share in other activities, all to show how you care and are listening. Adolescents will often prefer to talk with their peers rather than with their parents. We must remember that this is not a bad thing, in and of itself. Support from friends is a wonderful source of strength for all of us, adults and children, when coping with anxiety.
• Teach your child relaxation techniques
  Children respond well to relaxation techniques and guided imagery. Besides the physical benefits and the calm you can use this time to practice the exercises together. Sharing an activity like this together can be very relaxing and enjoyable.
• Turn the anxiety into something enjoyable
  Many things that cause anxiety can also create excitement and anticipation. For example, if your child is apprehensive about going from kindergarten into Grade One, you can try and turn it into something exciting to look forward to. Go shopping together for school supplies, and work together with the child on school preparation workbooks. Anxiety often crops up before a move so you can try to discuss how your child will set up and decorate their new room, and try to shift the focus to the more enjoyable parts of the move.
• Be aware of signs of distress
  If you feel your child is excessively anxious, more so than you can handle or that he is having difficulty in his day to day functioning turn to professional help. In adolescents anxiety can lead to dangerous forms of behavior or to substance abuse. Be well aware of this possibility and seek help if necessary.

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